What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
14.06.2025 05:54
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Has your wife or girlfriend ever been felt up in public by a stranger?
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
What is it like to have an insanely beautiful girlfriend?
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Who was the guy that had sex with the AIDS monkey?
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
What are some questions obviously just asked for sexual gratification?
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
What kind of book did you write after turning 55?
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Does being poor build better character than being born rich?
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
As an inmate did you have to live alongside a bully for your whole sentence?
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Why are daughters mean to their mothers?
Make Nazis afraid again!
TEXT:
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
What would you do if you were lost at sea in the Florida Keys?
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!